3 YEARS

Well, 3 years is a pretty f…ing  big deal. But yet it’s a normal way of life now. It’s my new normal and I like it just fine.  I’m 3 years older but better, skin looks good, I’m super healthy, no meds, I eat really well (just made this awesome hot fudge sauce, sugar’s still a problem), now that I don’t drink I can smell and taste food.  No anxiety, except about my pregnant DIL and mosquitoes and what the Olympics will bring back.  Exercise is easier or at least more enjoyable, sometimes.  Senses are definitely heightened when you stop numbing. Spiritually things are heightened also, sunrises feel more awesome, the full moon seems more brilliant than before. Life and love are more precious, some of that’s my age but not all.  Mornings filled with shame and regret are long gone. Nice.

The 3 years haven’t been all flowers and candy. It’s gotten lots easier to just say no but it was really hard in the beginning. I still remember the first week vividly, but, I don’t remember much about the next 30 or 60, just that things got better and I felt like a new person.  I am not new, I just shed the shitty skin to find the real me underneath.  I was there all along, hiding, being buried in fog and shame.  It was so good to burst free.

I’ve had some awesome treats over the 3 years, I’m the Queen of self care. Tea, cake, bubbles, candles, magazines, books, pedicures, you name it and I say yes, I’ve earned it! But when it comes to the soberversaries I’ve shared with family, a little.

Olive, my first year present is a constant joy and reminder what lots of love and a little training can do for us all. We share a special bond.  She doesn’t drink alcohol either. She behaves well in the house but really turns into a little devil when she’s unleashed.  We share that also, well, I don’t always behave well in the house.

At two years we had some extra hardwood floors added to the house and I love them too. Definitely an improvement for the house and our lives.  Kids and dogs seem to love to throw up or spill on carpet so the absence of those has made life lots easier. Just so happened we had them installed around year two. So why not think of it as my present. Beats a new teacup.

For three years we’re having the kitchen remodeled.  Timing is everything, it’s not for my soberversary but hey,  I’ll take it. Not a big remodel but cabinets and counters.  It’s really time, our cabinets have seen better days.  We actually had one fall off the wall a couple years ago (one too many cookbooks!)  That’s not just a treat for me but Husband#1 too.  He does almost all the cooking so he’ll enjoy it too.  He’s at 207+ days and still going. He got a new down pillow for a treat and sleeps like a baby. I’m very proud of him, love him even more. Things are really good with us right now. Nice.

So, at 3 years life is normal, ups and downs, laughter and tears, normal.  So much better than before, so much richer and fuller, more meaningful.  If you’re thinking about quitting, stop thinking and do it. What I’ve written above is the truth, things get better when you put down the glass. Just don’t drink today, I’m not.

You guys have been with me every step of the way and I thank you all for that.  Wouldn’t be here without you, love you all.  To my girlfriend in France, je t’aime. Onward to 4.

Sharon

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My old self.

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My baby

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My daughter and son and the gifts they have given me.

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24 thoughts on “3 YEARS

  1. Congratulations Sharon. Happy Beautiful Amazing 3 years. We will Have to meet for coffee to celebrate! Hugs, Margaret

  2. What a brilliant read! Your post is spilling over with peace and happiness and gratitude, while acknowledging that with ups come downs and with laughter come tears. As you put it, nice. Congratulations on your three years. Wow.

  3. Many congratulations!! I am 55 years old and 900 days sober this week. Finding your blog was a godsend, like “Ahhh, someone my age who gets it!” Thank you for inspiring me and for making me laugh with recognition. It’s not all hearts and flowers, I can’t seem to lose the ten post-menopausal pounds that snuck up on me after I quit drinking (damn you, mint chocolate chip ice cream!), and I still get a little bitchy at times in spite of religiously using my meditation app. But life, with all its messiness, is good and I’m able to be present for the people I love, which is the best gift of all. Thanks again and I hope you keep writing!

  4. I love this post. It sounds like you are in a great place: the right balance of optimism, realism, self reflection, and I-don’t-give-a-hoot-ism. You are a hilarious and sweet inspiration to me. Thanks!

  5. Many congratulations. Reading your post fills me with confidence and inspiration. Its great to read that sober is now “normal” for you – I’m so looking forward to that. Enjoy your well deserved new kitchen 🙂

  6. Hey Sharon,
    Congratufuckinglations on three years! I love your blog – have I told you that lately? And I’m so happy that hubs #1 has stayed with it. Nobody’s life was ever improved by booze, I tell you. Rounding the corner on two years – thanks for the glimpse into the future!

    Much love,
    Mary

  7. Congratulations! I will never forget finding your blog….I’m on Day 126 now and will never forget the first days of my journey. You were there, reaching out, reaffirming, supporting, and telling me the truth when Wolfie and I had tried to mask it into something I didn’t need to change. But I did. Somehow, you and your blog were my lighthouse in the darkness and if you could do it, I could. Thank you (again and again and again) for your blog, your honesty, and your light.

  8. You speak so much truth! Sobriety does make all of the little things so much better… I think that being sober makes me more in tune with all the things that matter. Congrats to you. And enjoy that new kitchen!

  9. Hooray for three years and hooray for you and your blog! I love how real you are and the way you write. So relatable. Enjoy your new kitchen…I’m jealous.

  10. big congratulations on your three years, Sharon. you were (and still are!) always there a few steps ahead of me, holding out a hand and saying, “look – this is hard but it is entirely possible and it’s better this way. and if I can do it so can you!”

    thanks as ever for your example, your gentle strength and your humour. you are one hell of a woman! Prim xxx

  11. Happy three years and 2 days. What a beautiful tribute to the joys awaiting us all. I love the pictures of you, puppy, and family. Such a gift indeed. You inspire us all. ♥ Lisa

  12. Congratulations Sharon!! 3 years is absolutely fantastic. Thanks for the update on how you are doing. That is amazing about your husband- way to go!! Your life sounds filled with simple pleasure and joy. Lots of love to you! -Jen

  13. I just found your blog and want to tell you congrats. I’m on day 2 and I need to listen to other people and their experiences. I’m around your age and am looking forward to the rest of my life being clear headed and present for my 10 grandchildren and family as well….keep posting! I need it!

  14. Thank you for being my first like. I really have no idea what I’m doing tech wise but right now I just need to post everyday. I’ll make a “pretty” and original website later. Congrats on your 3 years! I feel so blessed to have found Belle’s blog and this community. Well, thanks again and I’ll forward to your next post!

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