Some of you guys have inquired about my whereabouts and well being. Warms my heart that some of you virtual strangers care.
Well, I’m feeling fucking great. I’m keeping really busy. I still don’t watch the news but I developed a new philosophy, why bother. Life’s too short to live it all tied up in knots and anxious, so I leave the room if Husband #1 starts with CNN. My blood pressure starts to rise just listening from afar. So on to better things.
I have baby Eve two days a week, she’s a joy and such a good baby. My last grandchild. Well they had to stop sometime. The grandchildren are a true joy and a little pain in the ass depending on the mood we’re all in. Wouldn’t trade it for the world. Even if I have to watch “Moana” a million times. Sober parenting and grandparenting is so much better. No wishing them away or asleep in order to give me more drinking time.
I’m at 1300 and something days. Deleted my counter and can’t remember what the app was to get it back. Belle keeps track for me and yes I’m still a pen pal, it will be 4 years at the end of July. Best years of this third phase of my life. (Shit it’s hard to write that but true.) Mortality really hits you in the face around 55-60 and now at 65 I’m doing everything I can to stay healthy and active. 65 for fuck sake. Seems like yesterday I was part of the hippie movement in the 70’s, free love and stuff though, I never burned my bra, I still need all the padding I can get to keep me from looking like Peter Pan. TMI, tough!
Husband #1 has almost 450 days and things are great with us. It’s so much easier now that we’re both clear headed.
Miss Olive is pure joy, she was my gift for one year sober and a constant reminder to stay that way. Hard to walk a dog in the evening if you’re swaying down the street. Plus, as my pilates instructor says, balance, balance, balance is the most important thing. I remember having to pull myself up the steps some nights when I was drinking because I was swaying so much. Bad, sad memories, but all in the past.
Going back to the beach again at the end of August. Can’t wait, love everything except that 17 hour drive with two big dogs in the backseat. Ralph will be 10 this spring and he’s still a handful, would take the mailman’s leg off if we’d let him.
So how else can I share, well, it’s still hard at times to go up and down the steps without seeing my step mother lying there, but the image is fading, like a ghost. I suppose it will all just disappear one day. It is easier than before so time does heal, it truly does.
My days are full and now that Husband #1 has retired I spend more time out of the house. LOL, that’s not quite true, figured I throw that in, literary license. I’m still irreverent, love me the f bomb but as littles are getting bigger I have to curtail my trash talk.
Oh, and I had Villanova winning the whole tournament. Another year of losing picks. Damn.It.
I’m here, I’m well, I’m sober. I hope you’re the same. If you’re stuck, email me. I’ll try to help. Life is short and hard, don’t fuck it up more than it already is by adding alcohol into the mix. It will rob you of precious time.
I’ll leave you with this, not sure when I should come clean, maybe never. Two of my granddaughters think I was Wonder Woman when I was younger. I told them I had to turn in my bracelets when I got too old for the job. Eventually they’ll realize I don’t have the boobs for the costume.
Hang in there.