The Ocean, Sun, Sand, Surf, Deer, Barking Foxes, and a very Weak Wolf with Orange Hair

Well, I am at the beautiful beach on the Outer Banks of North Carolina, Duck, North Carolina to be exact, named not after the bird but a guy who used to do a lot of duck hunting ( how charming, maybe, stupid, maybe.)  It’s fine if we stay in this area, but venture out to the grocery store or gas station and you see cars with pro Trump stickers and I throw up in my mouth each time. Guns, cigarettes and fuckwad Trump, what the hell has happened to America?  If any of you readers are Trump supporters stop reading my blog and go grow a brain. If I offended anyone from North Carolina, sorry, your Outer Banks are breathtaking.

Like any of you give two shits about my vacation, but I’m going to tell you anyway. We arrived June 4.  We are here for 3 weeks, Yep, three hot, sun scorched weeks at the beach. Pray that the sun block actually blocks those bad rays, I’ve already had plenty of things frozen by dermatologists off my old body, don’t want any more.

This is a pre-retirement trip. Husband #1 was planning to retire at end of year and the company has speeded up that process by 6 months so he’s in transition. It was difficult for him at first but he’s dealing with the whole “what am I going to do now” thing a little better and isn’t so stressed.  That’s due in part to the fact that he’s 162 days sober.  This is his first sober vacation, he committed to 180 and he keeps his commitments. (Whether he likes it or not, I think I told you we’re married 37 years😳)

The beast was hounding him the first night, making him cranky and nasty. He recognized what it was and overcame the urge.  We had driven 18 hours, had little sleep and junk food, the old H.A.L.T thing is a real, palpable trigger if you’re not careful.

As for me, the wolf has leaned over my shoulder a couple times trying to get me to romanticize what a cold glass of white wine would feel like. He forgets it would never be just one glass. If I follow where that one glass would lead, I would be missing out on my morning sunrises. I’ve never been especially religious, but seeing the sun rise over the ocean, watching dolphins feed almost close enough to touch and pelicans fly in formation over foaming water, well power of God, etc., etc.   No alcohol allowed.

Very early yesterday morning while I was outside with my dogs, (yes we brought those damn dogs 18 hours in a car to the beach,) I watched two deer chomp on some bushes in the front yard and slowly cross the driveway into the thicket. This morning a fox barked at me, scared the hell out of Olive, scary bark. It,too, was on the driveway.  Luckily, we have a fenced yard for the dogs. So I’m surrounded by wildlife and my little munchkins haven’t even arrived yet.

The kids and grandchildren arrive tomorrow and stay a week. Chaos, chaos and more chaos, they’ll be lots of laughter, lots of toddler tantrums and loads of hugs and kisses. I can’t wait. We’ll also need those last few days of our vacation to recover, so excellent planning on my part. There will be some beer and wine in the house for the big kids (kids..ages 37-32) my, my I’m old, mature, shit, I wish there was a better word for old, it sounds so..old.

That bastard, the wolf, who looks a lot like Donald Trump, will probably whisper occasionally in my ear, but I have the same response for him I’ve been using for 3 years come this July 28. Fuck off, moron.

Cheers from the beach.


Just like this.

Touch above to hear the fox, for those of you who’ve never heard a fox bark!




9 thoughts on “The Ocean, Sun, Sand, Surf, Deer, Barking Foxes, and a very Weak Wolf with Orange Hair

  1. I hear you. We were in Kitty Hawk last week with our daughter, her husband, and our 12 week old grandson. My wife and I should have booked an extra week to recover. No alcohol for me either but was supremely tempted. Enjoy Duck!!!

  2. You are such a total fucking warrior. Enjoy the beach, enjoy that timeless, relaxing sound of the water slapping the sand (to me, it’s always there as a background roar. Perfect)
    You make me laugh, God, you do, & you’re an inspiration. Kids, Grandkids & dogs. Perfection.

    BTW- Totally with you on the Trump. What kind of geek name is that anyway? A trump is a little kids arse burp over here.

    Donald Trump = Duck Fart

  3. ooh that beach sounds just delicious. are there nice places to eat where you are, too? sober holiday = twice as much money to spend on food in my book! tell us all the details!

    good for no 1 and you in identifying HALT. tbh if I had spent 18 hours in a car with my husband and my dog I’m not sure our marriage would withstand it 😉

    with you on the boredom with the news. here in the UK we are in the throes of the run up to the referendum on leaving the EU. a terrifying combination of vitally important and complex issues with tediousness.

  4. Oh my God you make me laugh – and I couldn’t agree with you more. Trump? What the hell has happened to this country? Enjoy your time with the kids and all the babies. Plan something pampery for yourself when they all clear out! Happy anniversary – we’re at 37 years, too! Isn’t life grand…..

  5. Sounds awesome, I would love to visit NC. We in Canada are a little worried about you, America, after all, we’re best buddies, but together we tuned up a few bad guys in our time, so we’ve figured that you will soon send the orange haired moron back to his cave and build a wall round it – Canadians would help pay, and pretty sure Mexico would throw in a few dollars 🙂

  6. love the post…
    and love the idea of that wolf with trump’s face..that’ll keep anyone fro drinking!

    how awesome that your husband committed to 180 days, and how interesting that just happened to land i an “early” retirement. Perhaps he’ll get the hint that if he can do this now..well….how much better not drinking can be.
    Doesn’t matter tho. You know, and that is awesome
    have a great vacation, sounds lovely!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s